TWENTY-FIRST SUNDAY IN ORDINARY TIME
22 AUGUST 2021
Every
once in a while, a couple will choose today’s second reading from Saint Paul to
the Ephesians as their second reading for their wedding Liturgy. I love to watch the reaction in the
congregation. Husbands smile and poke
their wives when Saint Paul announces that “wives should be subordinate to
their husbands in the Lord.” Many wives
frown and poke them back. They are
listening to Saint Paul’s words through 21st century ears. They think that Saint Paul is encouraging men
to control their wives and dominate them.
In fact,
this is not what Saint Paul is saying at all.
Saint Paul is using first century Roman marriage customs. At that time, husbands were in complete
control of the family, and every member of the family was subordinate to him –
wives, children, and slaves. This
cultural pattern lasted for many centuries.
If you have ever been to a play written by William Shakespeare in the 16th
century, wives routinely refer to their husbands as “my lord.”
Instead, he
is telling the disciples of Jesus Christ who live in Ephesus that their
marriages can be visible signs of the mystery of Christ’s relationship with his
Church. Christ is the faithful
bridegroom who has given everything to his bride the Church. Good marriages help us to understand that
mystery. For that reason, husbands and
wives need to subordinate themselves to each other out of reverence to Christ. In subordinating themselves to Christ, wives
subordinate themselves to their husbands.
In subordinating themselves to Christ, husbands need to die to
themselves for the sake of their families, as Christ died for his bride the
Church. Instead of challenging the
marriage customs of his day, he argues that faithful disciples who imitate the
love of Christ can transform their lives.
Saint Paul
gives us that same message. Today’s
marriages may take different forms. But,
if we model ourselves after the self-giving love of Jesus Christ, we can allow
that love to transform our lives and our culture. In truth, couples today do not have the
support they need to make and keep permanent commitments in marriage. That is why weekends like Marriage Encounter
can help support healthy marriages.
Those whose marriages have ended in divorce need our support as they
move forward to be healed and to trust in the presence of the Lord Jesus in
their lives as they move forward. Those
who have been widowed also need our help.
We are the Church, walking with them to accept the consolation that the
Lord promises to those who grieve. Those
who are called to live as single people need our support.
The real
challenge for married couples is to believe that marriage truly is a
Sacrament. In living the Sacrament of
marriage in good times and in bad, they are showing the rest of us what the
love of Christ looks like. In embracing
this message of Saint Paul to the Ephesians, they can increase their trust that
the Sacramental Grace of marriage is active in them. That grace enables them to confront the
challenges and difficulties in ways they could never have anticipated.
In today’s
Gospel, we hear the end of the “Bread of Life” discourse in Saint John’s
Gospel. Many of his disciples cannot
accept that he gives his flesh and blood to them in the form of transformed
bread and wine. They leave him and
return to their former ways of life.
They can no longer accompany him.
Peter speaks for us when Jesus asks if he wants to leave also. “Master, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and are convinced
that you are the Holy One of God.” As we
receive the Eucharistic Lord at this Mass, we too accept his nourishment to
maintain our faith and to accompany him, trusting that he can transform our
lives and world.
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